Day 12: Hammer Pilsner

A rearing horse with a wild mane, a bold, brutish name...I was waiting to get smacked between the eyes. More of a love tap. If it's a hammer, it's inflatable.

Not that it was all that bad. Decent pil that was a bit spoiled by a metallic tang. I liked the carbonation, which was light but persistent.

I'm starting to realize why they sell boring beer in giant amounts. You have to drink a lot of it to start enjoying yourself. 1 Bud? Blah. 2 Buds? Meh. 3 Buds? It's growing on me. 4 Buds? What is that music, it sounds awesome. 8 Buds? I'm awesome!

You get the idea.

But I'm really not much of a fan of going past a mild buzz, so that's not my scene. I'd much rather have one or two high quality, high flavour drinks - even if I have to pay more for each one. It's cheaper than mass consumption, more fun (at least for me) and produces far less in the way of consequences.

This beer did not turn me off, but my crank sure didn't get turned. Nudged a little, maybe. 2 steins.

 

Day 11: Ottakringer  Wiener Original

Right off the bat, anything this colour called a "wiener" beer? Caution. Not sure I want to drink the wiener beer. Maybe this advent calendar has been lulling me into a sense of complacency just so it can punk me by getting me to down the brown wiener water.

But it frothed up so nicely. Not a thick head, but relatively tall. And there was character. Some genuine maltiness and a little more hop than the calendar has recently provided.  A little caramel and vanilla, slightly, almost imperceptibly floral.

Of note: my experience with "interesting" beers is that I almost always start out too cold and end up enjoying them more as they warm up. Not so with the Ottakringer. Keep this wiener cold. As it warms up, the weiner starts to develop a funny after taste. Maybe that has to do with being in an aluminum can for a while. But that makes sense. Wieners should not be in cans. Wieners should be free. Cold and free. Four steins.

Day 10: Konigsbacher Spezial Export

Hey, that's the way it was spelled on the can.

You know what? This is a lager. Clean, clear and light-tasting. No surprising flavours, but a surprising aspect that definitely added to the experience.

The carbonation was light, but it didn't stop. I mean it, the bubbles just kept going. I slowed way down just to see if they would last and they absolutely did. What this did was keep just a thin but fresh head on this beer, sip after sip. It was a pleasant surprise each time. Perhaps it made a canned beer seem just a little more fresh, a little more draught-like.

I don't know if this was a fluke or if this was what the "z" in "spezial" was referring to, but I enjoyed this beer and definitely wished I had more. 4 steins!

 

Day 9: Gerstel Hefeweizen

The good: There's a buxom serving girl on the can and she's holding six steins full of beer :)

The bad: This is yet another hefeweizen

The ugly: Completely indistinguishable from the hefeweizen from day 8. Seriously, I just should have reviewed them together. I guess the suggestive (though crudely drawn or rendered) can made me feel like this one deserved a post of its own.

So I don't want to trash this beer too much. It was okay. I won't describe it since you can just read the previous review. I do want to go after the folks who put this calendar together. Why the hell even put two hefeweizens in a row, let alone two hefeweizens that could, like identical twins, take tests for each other with the teacher none the wiser?

Not exactly an isolated incident, either. While there were differences, beers 3 through 6 were awfully similar (and nothing spectacular) as well. Makes me feel as though they're just dressing up the same doll with different clothes.

In order not to punish this brew specifically, I award two steins. But the calendar as a whole is teetering on the brink of zero steins, as in I don't think I'm very excited about ever purchasing another one of these again.

I like variety. I dislike conformity. I celebrate diversity. Jesus Christ! If I wanted something bland that didn't stray too far from a stilted median, I could have stayed in the Mormon church!

 

Day 8: Eibauer Hefeweizen Hell

Hefeweizen, of course, means a wheat ale. "Hell" would be the equivalent of "light". Not so sure about that second part.

Cloudy and yeasty like any hef, I'd say this was actually very middle of the road as far as colour and robustness, at least for a wheat ale.

Tasted slightly floral with a hint of cloves. Add the yeast component and it was a little like a mildly spicy loaf of bread. Not bad, but not especially inspiring for someone who isn't really inclined towards hefeweizens.

It was interesting, at least. I found myself taking a long time to drink it as I sipped and tried in vain to place some flavour components that were teasing my palate.

Glad I tried it, probably won't go out of my way to repeat the experience, unless I can get some to have with some sort of spiced, baked desert. I have a feeling there's a pairing out there somewhere that is ideal for this stuff. Two steins.

 

Day 7: Germania Premium Strong

Finally.

Poured thick and golden, not much head or carbonation, little to no hop aroma, hints of vanilla and something woody. 7.9% ABV.

Rich tasting, with toffee and vanilla notes. Lingering aftertaste that amplified those flavours. I want to say the woodiness was an oak taste. That might be true or it might be that because this beer reminds me of an Innis & Gunn without the smokiness, I'm looking for the same oak notes.

Good stuff. I've mentioned before that I like Innis & Gunn. I suspect that if I could get this Germania brew in a bottle or on tap somewhere I might like it even better.

I took the top half of this down fairly quickly, then decided to savour it in the hot tub. The time it took me to get out there allowed the beer to warm a bit, and that was a good thing. I decided to go all the way with a warming experiment and actually submerged most of the glass in the warm water to heat things up a few degrees. Wow. Should have done that right off the start. If I had another can of this, I wouldn't even refrigerate it. The flavours both intensified and blended, and the finish smoothed even further.

Excellent beer. Abundantly flavourful though there was nothing exotic about said flavour. 8 steins!

       

Day 6: Fohrenburger Unser Bier

There's a unicorn on the can. +1 This is the first beer I've ever had from Austria. +1more. It actually tastes like it has something going on. + another 1

I found a website that claims this is a special anniversary beer made special by the "best" raw ingredients and glacial water. I suspect that there's a little bit more of a complex hop profile going on than in the last few beers I've reviewed, and I wouldn't be surprised to find out that this beer was close to officially qualifying as a pilsener.

It poured slightly cloudy, but that cleared up quickly. Not a lot of carbonation, and what head there was disappeared after the first couple of drinks. Very clean tasting, with hops clearly present but not crossing into bitter territory at all. The hops are the harmony rather than the melody here. Slightly more floral than citrus.

I'll admit that the pleasantness of the first sips were aided by the fact that I earned this beer (and the next one I'm going to drink...hey, it's Friday) by playing basketball for an hour and a half. Almost any beer is going to taste good after that. But this one stayed interesting all the way down. Nothing is blowing me away, but there is just enough complexity going on to make me think about what I'm drinking every time I take a sip. That's the way it should be. Very clean aftertaste.

And it's Austrian. If pressed, I'd say it was more Von Trapp than Schwarzenegger, even though I don't know what the hell I mean by that.

But if it was Schwarzenegger, it would be this one. (That's him on the left)

I would actually buy this stuff. It rockets to the #2 spot so far on this calendar. Four steins! With an edelweiss garnish!